Worthy Parenting-Early Childhood

Decades ago, there was a marketing promo for the United States Peace Corps that coined the phrase: “The Peace Corps. The toughest job you’ll ever love.”

Dang, I think that phrase is more descriptive of what it’s like to be a parent, particularly now.

It’s damn difficult to be a parent. This is even more true if you didn’t have a good model or worse no model of good-enough parenting. In those instances, you are making it up as you go along, listening to your instincts, common sense, and hoping you’re doing the right thing.

You don’t have to be perfect!

One of the people I saw in my practice recently, 30-year-old Emma, is a working mom to her 3-year-old daughter Dana. Toilet training is going on these days and Dana almost has it down. If it was not for the confusion that pull-up pants create, she’s there on the potty. Dana is in childcare until 6 pm due to the work demands put on her parents. She is thriving there, acquiring social and language skills rapidly. She loves working with her dad on Herbie, the VW Beetle he rebuilt.

It is evident that both parents are helping Dana build a strong cornerstone of worth. They both have their moments of worry and doubt themselves. It is also obvious to anyone else that Dana is a spunky little girl and hitting all her developmental milestones. Simply chatty and adorable!

Children need to develop basic trust in the world. To do so, a sense of predictability, structure, attention, and affection makes for well-adjusted worthy kids.

You cannot spoil a child with too much love and affection under the age of two.

There’s a video going around Facebook of a little girl no more than three years old who got her finger stuck in a door. This comes from The Cain Connection, and you can check it out here.

Mom gets her attention and prompts her to breathe; she then tells her to repeat “I’m strong. I’m beautiful and I’m worthy.” That affirmation builds upon her cornerstone of worth and is fundamental to her growth and self-confidence.

Robert Brooks and Eric Erickson emphasize imparting a sense of worthiness to promote resilience through the life span. I expand on these concepts in my upcoming book, Being Worthy which will come out next year. Be sure to check it out.

Language acquisition is how all sorts of social skills come together for kids. With young children, you’ve probably noticed that they understand more of what’s going on than they can articulate. The so-called “Terrible 2s” is an example of a time that this gets played out. Ever see a child pound a pillow, crying and screaming in frustration because he/she can’t get the point across to the parents? It’s important to listen, talk, and read to them. Don’t let your cellphone or tablet do your dirty work to occupy the time. Let your children use their words.

Be keenly aware of your language around your child for God’s sake!

On one of my supermarket trips, I heard a little boy about four years old tell his mother to go f—k herself. What was worse, there was no reaction nor any consequence to this behavior.

As the brain of a young child is absorbing EVERYTHING in their immediate environment, parents need to be aware of its literal programming. Once things go into that cute little mind, it’s not easy to delete.

Be sure to sing and laugh with your child as much as you can. Take many images and videos. The time goes by fast and those wonderful moments in the car or before bed are priceless.

There will be more discussion of raising worthy kids with worthy parenting in future blogs. In the meantime, make sure to check out The Worthy Alphabet, and please send your comments to the Being-Worthy.com feedback section.